Spring Break
Political brilliance on display
Column: Media Bias
Steve Markley, Senior Staff Writer
Issue date: 4/26/05 Section: OpEd Page
Republicans are brilliant. Not Einstein-brilliant or Batman-brilliant, but Bond-villain brilliant. Only when the Right Wing has some guy strapped to the table with laser about to cut him up the middle starting at the groin, they rarely choose to turn off the penile-slicing laser to explain their villainous plot.
Case in point: the recent blockade of our fratastic president's judicial nominees, some of whom make Anton Scalia look like Michael Moore. We're talking about folks up for positions of serious power who advocate the execution of retarded children who've had a passing thought about abortion, judges who would use the Constitution as a brine-soaked rag to better conduct electricity to the testicles of Arabs detained on the streets of Baghdad, Kabul and Detroit.
The Bush Administration has intentionally put this slate of reactionaries on the docket because they know they are essentially five Senate votes away from ruling the universe. The last bastion of defense for Democrats is the filibuster, a centuries-old practice that Republicans would now like to abolish because it has become politically inconvenient.
Aside from the obvious immorality of changing the rules to suit one's own needs, the way conservatives have framed this issue is appalling in its sheer genius and ruthlessness. Advertisements show a young, white adolescent holding a Bible in one hand and a gavel in the other and asks why we should make our children choose between their faith and a life in public service.
For once, my weeping was completely unrelated to my practice of self-pleasure. It's just so damn smart, so damn disingenuous, so damn perfect for the Republicans who have proven in the last election so goddamn brilliant at dividing voters on "moral" issues in order to conquer them.
The ad shamelessly equates religious faith (and who are we kidding here - Christian faith) with politics. Certainly no God-fearing judge exists who Democrats have not tried to block. Every judge the Democrats have ever let through is a secular baby-killer who commonly pisses on Bibles and sodomizes himself with a crucifix. The entire campaign aims to make the debate about individual faith rather than the extreme political views of individuals who will hold tangible power over our daily lives.
The wall between church and state, which was probably the best idea that slave-raping Thomas Jefferson ever had, has not crumbled. Rather it is being dismantled piece by piece, brick by brick, soon to be transformed into a turnstile which will bump religious fanaticism lightly on the hip as it passes through into legislation.
I'm not sure who should be more insulted by this assault: the secular people like me who are having all those abortions and partaking in all that sodomy or the truly faithful who have had their most intimate beliefs hijacked by a minority bent on imposing their radical will.
Case in point: the recent blockade of our fratastic president's judicial nominees, some of whom make Anton Scalia look like Michael Moore. We're talking about folks up for positions of serious power who advocate the execution of retarded children who've had a passing thought about abortion, judges who would use the Constitution as a brine-soaked rag to better conduct electricity to the testicles of Arabs detained on the streets of Baghdad, Kabul and Detroit.
The Bush Administration has intentionally put this slate of reactionaries on the docket because they know they are essentially five Senate votes away from ruling the universe. The last bastion of defense for Democrats is the filibuster, a centuries-old practice that Republicans would now like to abolish because it has become politically inconvenient.
Aside from the obvious immorality of changing the rules to suit one's own needs, the way conservatives have framed this issue is appalling in its sheer genius and ruthlessness. Advertisements show a young, white adolescent holding a Bible in one hand and a gavel in the other and asks why we should make our children choose between their faith and a life in public service.
For once, my weeping was completely unrelated to my practice of self-pleasure. It's just so damn smart, so damn disingenuous, so damn perfect for the Republicans who have proven in the last election so goddamn brilliant at dividing voters on "moral" issues in order to conquer them.
The ad shamelessly equates religious faith (and who are we kidding here - Christian faith) with politics. Certainly no God-fearing judge exists who Democrats have not tried to block. Every judge the Democrats have ever let through is a secular baby-killer who commonly pisses on Bibles and sodomizes himself with a crucifix. The entire campaign aims to make the debate about individual faith rather than the extreme political views of individuals who will hold tangible power over our daily lives.
The wall between church and state, which was probably the best idea that slave-raping Thomas Jefferson ever had, has not crumbled. Rather it is being dismantled piece by piece, brick by brick, soon to be transformed into a turnstile which will bump religious fanaticism lightly on the hip as it passes through into legislation.
I'm not sure who should be more insulted by this assault: the secular people like me who are having all those abortions and partaking in all that sodomy or the truly faithful who have had their most intimate beliefs hijacked by a minority bent on imposing their radical will.
